Me, part II

Goodbye and Farewell

Da K — Thu, 13 May 2010 09:27:13 +0000

The passing of March and April is followed by the arrival of May; and the arrival of May marks not only the end of my infatuation for one I’d like to call U but also the departure of one I’d like to call C.

Putting oneself out there is never easy, especially when it’s been forever since one’s done so. I am almost never the one to wear my heart upon my sleeve but that was exactly what I did with and for U, at least for a very short while.

Things with U did not end well, partly because of U’s inability to commit and partly because of my unwillingness to be dating someone who seems to be standing on an unequal footing, financially speaking.

Experience with U was tiring to say the least. There was a lack of honesty and frankness, not to mention the nagging feeling that I was being regarded as the bread-winner of this relationship.

To U, I say goodbye. It took very little NOT to pick up your call that night because I was ready to leave you for better options.

The reason for C’s departure is both personal and professional. And however heavily the professional aspect weighs in on C’s decision to depart, it is undeniable that I played a role in the personal aspect ; for I believe, quite firmly, that a romantic commitment on my part would have ensured C’s stay.

Even though C was all ready to take the plunge, things did not work out solely because of my hesitance and insecurity.

To this day, whatever it was between C and me was never admitted to and therefore never spoken for.

Am I feeling nostalgic? Certainly. But am I feeling regretful ? Honestly not. I am feeling nostalgic for what was and what could have been but am not feeling regretful because I am happy to see C following his heart and aspiration.

I will miss C, most likely more than C will do me.

To C, I say bon voyage ; you know it will take very little for me to pack and fly ; all I need is an invitation.

Why Am I Such A Fucking Moron?

Da K — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 15:04:54 +0000

What isn’t mine isn’t mine, no matter how much it may seem like it could be mine.

What isn’t mine could eventually be mine after god knows how long and at what cost.

What really kills me is knowing what isn’t mine COULD HAVE BEEN mine had I not been so goddamned aloof.

Why am I drawn to what isn’t mine but am unsatisfied with what is in front of me?

Why am I such a fucking moron?

Love me, do not L-O-V-E me

Da K — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 10:20:32 +0000

It took me almost four years to get to where I am today.

Not that I’ve accomplished a great deal professionally, but I now consider myself truly blessed to be surrounded by people who I call friends.

Friends come and go but there are a few who I wish would stay. Can not imagine how I’d gotten through before knowing them nor do I dare think about what life would without them.

Although it may sound naive, but I tend to hope that friends will remain friends without anyone crossing THAT certain boundary.

There are times when I wish I had the courage to say ‘Love me, but do not LOVE me’ because I am afraid that saying so will damage a hard earned friendship.

And honestly, I am uncertain about what others see in me nor do I know what I can possibly offer as a romantic counterpart.

Yes, I am afraid of commitment but that doesn’t make me a promiscuous player.

No one is getting any younger but what is the point of forging a relationship that is based on one’s biological clock?

As of now, at this particular point in time known as November the 19th, 2009 at 06:20pm, I wish to be loved but not L-O-V-Ed.

What Is Love, Really?

Da K — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 01:53:12 +0000

What is love, really?
Is it not the emotional entanglement of lust, jealousy, hope and despair?

What is love, really?
Is it not the homicidal impulse to rip out the hearts of those who stand in your way?

What is love, really?
Is it not the tangible proof to the testament that those who desire you are never the ones you desire ?

What is love, really?
Is it not the never ending quest to find out what love is?

What is love, really?
Is it not the 10 seconds in which your seamen ejaculates from your manhood?

What is love, really?
Is it not the willingness to put up with all that is humanly and characteristically imperfect?

What is love, really?
Is it not the insomnia I am suffering from at this very moment?

What is love, really?
Is it not the lingering eye contacts you tempt me with so very innocently?

What is love, really?
Is it not the silly question you asked about whether or not you are the one
who I would have liked to kiss?

What is love really?
Is it not my angst for the fact that you are so close, yet so far away?

What is love, really?
Is it not my longing to be held in your arms while feeling the rhythm of your heartbeats and the warmth of your body?

What is love, really?
Is it not you?

Death Is In Fashion

Da K — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 07:36:44 +0000

What do the following three movies have in common?

Cherry Blossoms – HANAMI
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Departures

You Will Go To Hell

Da K — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 07:43:38 +0000

If you throw around phrases such as ‘I love you’ or ‘I miss you’ all too easily.

Screw You, Patrick

Da K — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 16:13:31 +0000

Never would have thought that you are someone who would judge your friends by their outward appearance and social status ; not to mention that your judgment can not be more wrong, misconceived and further from the truth.

I am sad that I didn’t know you any better back then but am glad that I got to know you for who you truly are.

Stanza

Da K — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 07:45:00 +0000

image taken from
http://www.iphoneworld.ca/

My favorite IPhone app
http://www.lexcycle.com/

Life Is Short

Da K — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 07:01:00 +0000

And you ought to know that some people simply aren’t worth your time.

So Little Time

Da K — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 06:52:00 +0000

images taken from Amazon.com

So Many Books To Read

1. Possible Side Effects
2. The Brooklyn Follies